‘I can’t do this anymore’: Bruno Silva details mental health struggle, how Alex Pereira helped get last chance in UFC

Sports news » ‘I can’t do this anymore’: Bruno Silva details mental health struggle, how Alex Pereira helped get last chance in UFC

UFC 315 represents a critical juncture for Bruno Silva, whose future in the octagon hangs in the balance. A former opponent, Alex Pereira, played a key role in securing him this crucial final opportunity.

“Blindado” Silva and Pereira developed a friendship following their 15-minute bout in 2022. That fight marked the end of Silva`s seven-fight knockout streak and the beginning of a challenging period, resulting in six losses out of seven appearances. As Silva prepares to face Canada’s Marc-Andre Barriault this Saturday in Montreal, he fully understands that his career is on the line.

Getting this fight is somewhat unexpected, given that Silva had been informed of his release after a disappointing showing against Ismail Naurdiev last October.

“I got back home from Abu Dhabi the Monday after the fight, and my team and I were certain I was getting cut,” Silva shared. “Four losses, and not just losses, but really poor performances… I wasn`t fighting to win; I was fighting merely to survive. The last fight was the worst. My only thought was, `God, just get me out of here. I don`t want to be here. I can`t do this anymore. Not like this.` I still managed to survive all three rounds. I fought terribly, but I survived.”

Alone at home with his daughter, while his wife and mother were in Curitiba, Silva tucked his daughter into bed. He then checked his phone and saw a message from “Poatan” Pereira. The Brazilian superstar, then the UFC light heavyweight champion, asked Silva if he was alright after his fourth consecutive defeat.

“I called him to talk and explained what was happening,” Silva said, referencing the mental health issues he had disclosed publicly earlier that day. “I feared my career was over. He suggested, `Why don`t you talk to [UFC matchmaker] Mick [Maynard]? Why not reach out to the UFC personally and explain your situation? I know you, I fought you, and I know you`re fighting well below your capabilities.`”

Since Silva anticipated being released anyway, he felt there was nothing to lose by trying. He discussed it with his manager, Bernardo Serale, and drafted a message to Maynard, which he sent via Instagram. Silva typically didn`t speak English and wasn`t accustomed to communicating directly with Maynard.

“Bruno, I understand you,” Maynard reportedly replied to Silva, “But four losses in a row… Unfortunately, there`s nothing I can do.”

On Monday, October 28th, just two days after his loss to Naurdiev in Abu Dhabi, Bruno Silva was no longer a UFC fighter.

“I went back to my bedroom and began praying,” Silva recounted. “God, please give me another chance. Don`t let it end like this. I came so far, to the world`s biggest organization, and when I needed my health the most, I encountered these problems. Please help me.”

Minutes later, Silva left the room determined to try again. This time, he decided to write and translate the message himself.

“Mick, I`ve never refused any fight or opponent,” Silva recalled writing. “I fought everyone you offered. Nobody wanted to fight Poatan, and I did it. Nobody wanted to fight Shara [Magomedov], and I did it. There was no one I turned down. You know my performance has declined, but please give me some time, man. Let me seek treatment, take care of my head. Let me see a psychiatrist, get medication, and find my balance again.”

He sent the message, and a reply arrived within minutes.

“Bruno, I`ll give you one more fight,” Maynard wrote, according to Silva. “If you lose, there`s truly nothing more I can do. It`s in your hands now.”

Silva expressed his gratitude to Maynard and requested time to focus on his recovery.

“I dedicated myself completely to my health because I needed it,” Silva stated. “Not just for my career, but for myself. People thought I was depressed. No, far from it. I love life. I didn`t ask for this struggle, but I had to confront it. I asked God for a cure. The psychiatrist told me I needed to find a way to live with it, which initially panicked me. Then I realized I was asking God for the wrong thing. I was asking for a cure but wasn`t willing to do my part? `God, please help me do my best.`”

The UFC middleweight began seeing a psychologist twice a week and a psychiatrist weekly. Additionally, he utilized videos, books, medication, and spoke with others who had faced similar challenges. As the crisis began to subside, Serale texted him: “Ready to work?”

Maynard contacted his team in February to offer a match against Barriault for the May 10th event in Montreal, and Silva felt confident enough to accept. His mother and brothers traveled to Curitiba to be by his side during training camp, offering emotional support and guidance.

The fighter who once ventured to Russia to defeat veterans in their own territory needed to reconnect with his aggressive style, and UFC 315 appears to be the stage for it.

“Once the fight was booked, I watched three of his fights and then told [coach Andre] `Dida` to just tell me what needed to be done, and that`s it,” Silva said. “Seeing myself covered in blood with my hands raised is the peak of happiness for me. I want to go there and break him. I`m not looking for a nice, technical game. I`ll do what I`ve always done: have fun. I want to end the night feeling proud of myself. I want to go back home, for the people who love and support me, and continue my legacy. It would be incredibly unfair for my story to end like it almost did.”

“When I beat him, I already know what I`m going to say to Mick, the UFC, and to people who have gone through similar experiences. I want my story to be an example for them. It`s not the end of the world. Everything has a solution, everything has an answer, and you can bounce back if you believe in God. I see this fight as a rebirth, not just as an athlete, but as a person. It`s another chance for my career. I hope all of this is now in the past and that I have my hand raised in the end.”

Magnus Rothbury

Magnus Rothbury, 29, is a rising star in Liverpool's sports media scene. His fresh perspective on MMA and Premier League coverage has attracted a significant following on social media.

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